Excellent Dave Barry Excerpt

This raises another question: What, exactly, would a herring need to communicate? I mean, we're talking about creatures with roughly the same IQ as a Tic-Tac. They are not down there discussing Marcel Proust. My guess is they're probably breaking wind to convey extremely simple messages such as: ''Hey, it's dark!'' ''I know! The same thing happened last night!'' ''Who said that?'' ''Me!'' ''Who are you?'' '' A herring!'' ''Wow, that's amazing! I'm also a herring!'' ''Wow! I'm also a Yankees fan!'' ''Wow, that's amazing! I'm a Yankees. . .'' etc.